Confectionery giant Mars has just launched a major marketing campaign for its best selling candy bar, Snickers, that is centered on a make-believe language called ‘Snacklish’. Apparently ‘Snacklish’ is a “humorous way of speaking that revises everyday words and phrases for a Snickers-centric world. To underscore their origin, they are printed in the typeface and colors of the Snickers brand logo.”

Interesting. I’ve never been to a “Snickers-centric world”. I have no idea what a “Snickers-centric world” would look like. And from the sounds of it I don’t ever want to go there, either.

‘Snacklish’, like most made-up languages, is based on various plays on words. For example, basketball great Patrick Ewing will become ‘Patrick Chewing’. A taxi will become a ‘snaxi’. And rapper Master P is now ‘Master P-nut’.

According to Snickers, the possibilities are endless. Endless, yes. But also totally pointless.

The new marketing campaign will be rolled out in stages. The initial stage, unveiled this week, includes outdoor ads as well as content on the Snickers website and social networking sites like Facebook. Television commercials are then scheduled to begin appearing next week. And there will be more content on in the spring, including a way to translate regular language into the Snickers lingo.

Sounds like they’ve thought of everything. And I imagine this campaign is costing a pretty penny too. I can’t help but wonder, however, what’s the point of all this. Do the people at Snickers really believe that ‘Snacklish’ will take off? Will I be more likely to buy a Snickers over my usual bag of M&M’s just because my last name could somehow be reconfigured to “Peanutrowski.”

For my sake, I hope not.